By: Rebecca Chen, Intern

FRIENDSHIPS AT BOARDING SCHOOL

 You walk by that girl in your dorm, she smiles nicely and says hello. Later that day, you spot her sitting with her best friends in dining hall whispering and glaring at you. You are not quite sure if she’s the friend you thought she was.

Friendships at boarding school are different than friendships anywhere else in the world. Some people believe that the competition to succeed interferes with the relationships that you form with friends. Others love everything about their friends and would not trade them for the world. After speaking with a number of students who requested that their names not be mentioned, I was able to find out more on the subject.

A junior mentioned that she believes the academic competition at boarding school both hurts the friendships as well as makes them stronger. She said, “The competition can motivate you to excel in your work, or it can make you want to kill the girl. It depends on the kind of person you are.”

In contrast, a freshmen said that all the people she has met are genuine so far and she does not see competition affecting her friendships. However, this could be debated, as the prep has not been at boarding school long enough to have to deal with the college application process and other competitive ordeals.

On a different note, a few of the people interviewed said that they felt as if their “friends” sued them for homework. Is it possible that people are now backstabbing their friends for grades, instead of the usual boyfriends? A different junior mentioned, “I know a girl who only speaks to me when she needs help with her work. If I say ‘hi’ to her on the paths, I get no response.” That is not always the case though. Many students at boarding schools are truly happy with their friends and would never use them.

Friendships in an environment where you are with people all day, every day, progress more rapidly than anywhere else. Annoying habits may surface sooner and gossip spreads faster than it takes to get from the dining hall to your first class. It all depends on the friends you choose to hang out with and whom you trust. However, being with your classmates this much can also be an amazing experience that leads to memories that will last forever.

By: Shauna Lanea, Feature Writer

Teen pregnancy plays a significant role in today’s society. Not only do teenage pregnancies interfere with the success in life that these girls and guys might ultimately achieve but teen parents are a burden to all of us requiring far more public assistance than adults. Children born to teen parents tend to be both socially and economically disadvantaged in most cases. In this article, you will be introduced to both a male and female teen parent. As you read you will learn how teen pregnancy has affected both their lives in today’s society.

Can you imagine finding out your pregnant and being a minor? Thoughts of what your parents or family will have to say echo in the back of mind, so you replay the situation over and over in your head. I had the opportunity to interview two teenage girls dealing with this feeling. They are one in the same, sisters and their babies are three months apart. The younger sister Brianna was the first to find out she was pregnant and hid it for 6 months before anyone in here family found out and her older sister Paulette’s situation was a little different. Their mother was upset but learned that there was nothing she could do because the girls made a choice of continuing with their pregnancies and here are their stories.

Meet Brianna Woods, 16 years old and she is a teen parent. Brianna got pregnant at the age of 15 and she said that she had no stable environment to educate her on teen pregnancy. It was her first time being sexually active and she got pregnant when she said they used protection but she was not on birth control. “I felt as if I was pressured by my now ex-boyfriend and now I’m left alone to take care of our son, but with the help of my family,” Brianna said.

TCM: Do you feel like this was a hard choice and how has this changed your life? For the good, bad or both?

B.Woods: In the beginning, it was a regret but looking back on everything I don’t, I just wish I could have post-pone it. Did not think I could do it and I was not ready. I’m never bored, it made my life better but my freedom is limited.

TCM: If you did not have a support system, how would you manage?

B.Woods: I have to take care of my baby the best way I know how. I am currently working right now but at times it’s not enough.

TCM: How does your family feel about teen pregnancy?

B.Woods: They don’t agree, the way they make it seem. They have their days on when comments are made like it’s something I can take back. Then it makes me regret everything. My mom was very upset at me, I felt like she hated me for it.

TCM: What does life after high school entail for you?

B.Woods: I am to graduate from high school next year and I plan on attending college. I want to further my education. That’s one of the positive things my family tells me is to finish high school and attend college. I have to plan a future for my son its not about me anymore.

TCM: While you are in school who cares for your baby?

B.Woods: My mother and grandmother

TCM: Do you have any advice for our teen readers of this issue?

B.Woods: Don’t attempt to do anything if you’re not ready for the consequences. If you’re planning on getting pregnant, make sure you have a solid foundation because kids are expensive.

The next interview you will read is of Paulette Mitchell, an 18 years old teen mother and Brianna’s older sister. She had the hardships of love and lost last year when she lost her boyfriend of 3 years and father of their 5 month old baby girl Tristyn to violence.

TCM: How did learn you were pregnant?

P.Mitchell: I went to the hospital because I had a real bad stomach ache and I had been feeling bad for quite sometime. When my mom and grandmother took me to the hospital, I learned I was 6 weeks pregnant.

TCM: How did your mother react to the news?

P.MItchell: She went from being supportive to being mad and basically everything went down hill from there.

TCM: What’s your support system?

P.Mitchell: I have the help of my family, my boyfriend’s family and myself. My boyfriend was my biggest support system until he was shot and killed about 5 mos ago.

TCM: How does your family feel about teen pregnancy?

P.Mitchell: Actually, I don’t know. They were more mad at my younger sister Brianna because she was 15 and still in high school.

TCM: Are you attending school right now or working?

P.Mitchell: I’m currently working and I will be attending college in the fall, maybe at Texas Southern University.

TCM: Do you have any advice for our teen readers on this issue?

P.Mitchell: If you’re planning on having sex, protect yourself! Being young and pregnant puts your life on hold. Even if the baby is unborn your still risking the baby’s safety and health by having unprotected sex. Having a baby is real and not about fun and games. I love my child and would not change having her for the world, but be smart about the decisions you make. Think with a clear head.

Every time we read about teenage pregnancy, we hear the female’s point of view, so I thought it was time we hear from the males. Meet Rashad Lewis who had his first child at the age of 18. Now at the age of 22 he is a CEO of his own business venturing in Promotions/Marketing and is in his last year of college majoring in Business Management.

TCM: What do you think is the best way to prevent teen pregnancy?

R.Lewis: The best of preventing teenage pregnancy would be to not engage in sexual activity, practicing abstinence. But if you have sex, use protection and take birth control.

TCM: How did being a teen parent affect your future career and/or potential earnings?

R.Lewis: I learned it wasn’t about me and everything revolved around my child to where I put my career on hold and put myself second. All I wanted was to provide for my child allowing her to have what she needed, there’s never a limit on that.

TCM: Why do you think so many teens today become pregnant?

R.Lewis: Lack of education. If parents taught more sexual education, it would cut down on teens wanting to become pregnant.

TCM: What would you have done to prevent your pregnancy?

R.Lewis: Abstinence with the mother of my child.

TCM: In your opinion, what option do you see teens doing more of, as in keeping the baby, adoption or abortion? Did you consider these options?

R.Lewis: No matter the options the mother chose, and told me that she was going to keep my baby.

TCM: Do you have any advice for those teens that are pregnant or wanting to get pregnant?

R.Lewis: Life doesn’t stop it only begins. But it’s a bad idea to get pregant if your trying to keep your mate around. Babies aren’t subject to hold relationships together. If it’s already on the negative side, nothing will get better between the two parents. Its time to think about the baby to be born and time out for patching up relationships.

TCM: Do you have any regrets and if so name one?

R.Lewis: I have none, I just wish I would have waited.

TCM: Now after going through the life lessons of teenage pregnancy, what are your views on before and after?

R.Lewis: I’m not for teen pregnancy but a way can be made. My life has changed completely and every time I look at my daughter I’m happy and I know I chose to do the right thing. She’s keeps me going, I understand that her mother can’t do it alone and I’m going to be there always.

If you are a pregnant or know someone who is and is in need of help, feel free to contact your local Planned Parenthood Center in your tri-city area (www.plannedparenthood.org) or you can contact one of the links below:

http://www.thenationalcampaign.org

http://www.pregnancycenters.org

http://www.ResponsibilityProject.com

http://www.dosomething.org

By Shauna Lanea’, Feature Writer

Abuse is not love…This is the story of me and Tony

The day he hit me is the day I realized that I needed a change. My name is Christine Marie and this is my story of a teenage abusive relationship. I couldn’t believe that we started arguing over something so petty that lead to something so much more.

Tony and I dated for 7 months and it was love at first sight (or so I thought). Tony would shower me with gifts, unexpected trips to places I have never been before and there were even upfront confessions of him being in love with me. He said all the right things at all the right times and with me just coming out of a long distance relationship it was what I thought I needed. Nothing he ever did would make me think anything less of him or make me even question the fact that he may indeed be abusive mentally, physically or emotionally.

Everything I did seemed to anger him all of a sudden and I found myself changing who I was to make him happy. Tony would embrass me infront of my friends but I would shove it off when my friends would confront me about his actions. He began to control how I talked, who my friends were and slowly my world was wrapped up in him alone. He alienated me from my friends (the very good friends that told me he was no good for me) and I could not go to my family because I did not want to hear, “I TOLD YOU SO!”

Around the fourth month into the relationship, we began to argue everyday about his ex-girlfriend and other foolishness. I found out that Tony and his ex-girlfriend were still calling each other and texting each other all while we were together and ofcourse he lied about the entire thing.

We ended up getting into a huge screaming match on the phone one day and it ended with him saying that we were done. I jumped in my car and headed to his house hoping that we could talk about this and work things out. When I pulled up, Tony was waiting for me outside and before I could get out of the car good, he pulled me out. Tony jumped in my face, yelling and screaming calling me every name in the book.

Before I knew it, Tony had lifted me on the hood of my car and we were fighting like two guys in the street. He then choked me to where I could not breathe knowing that I have asthma and at that moment, our relationship seemed to flash before my eyes.

I was began to see things at a different angle and it was the angle that my friends and family were trying to tell me all this time. I noticed how he changed me and how my friends were negelected by me because he felt they did not fit into his dream relationship. Some how, I mustered up the strength to get him off of me and I ran to get into my car. He started to follow me in this slow “serial killer” walk yelling about how he loved me and that he was sorry. After finally leaving that situation, I realized that I love myself too much to be drugged through the mud like that and I never looked back.

Nobody should ever have to go through anything like like but it happens. I wanted to share my story to let people know that abuse is not okay and that it does not translate to love. I refuse to be a statistic.

For more information regarding abusive relationships, please contact: T.E.A.R. - Teens Experiencing Abusive Relationships, www.teenagainstabuse.org.